God Spotting

I don’t think any of my friends is a morning person. Most of them are stay-awake-until-morning people, sure, but to willingly get up really early for no urgent reason, not really. So I’m just going to put this idea out there for anybody who would like to try this out.

What if

we sleep early and wake up early? Like 9 or 10 pm early and 4 or 5 am early?

What if

we meet up for breakfast and coffee (well, you guys can have coffee) somewhere in one of those 24 hour places in the Makati CBD area while the rest of the world is asleep and start our day with good company, intelligent conversation, and maybe even prayer to start the day?

What if

we do this once a week?

Wouldn’t that be cool

to get at least one gimmick in with friends once a week and get a good night’s rest too? According to studies, sleep before midnight is twice the quality of sleep we get after midnight that’s why even when we wake up extra early the next morning, we don’t feel groggy or tired.

and wouldn’t that be cool

to walk around Makati before it goes into its rush hour mode? the air is still chilly, and quiet. hardly any cars on the street (which reminds me, I should bring my longboard to the apartment already.).

It’s really a great way to start a day.

What do you say?

(Yes, I am aware of the irony of this post because I know I have a reputation as the girl who never sleeps. But I’m changing my sleeping patterns slowly but surely– except when there are deadlines, like right now. But, anyway… it seems like a good idea while I was walking down my street coming from breakfast this morning at 5:40am.)

Sometimes the night was beautiful
Sometimes the sky was so far away
Sometimes it seemed too steep so close
You could touch it but your heart would break
Sometimes the morning came too soon
Sometimes the day could be so hot
There was so worth much left to do
But so much you’d already done

Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise you
Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise you
And I will seek You in the morning
And I will learn to walk in Your ways
And step by step You’ll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days

Sometimes I think of Abraham
How one star he saw had been lit from me
He was a stranger in this land
And I am that no less than he
And on this road to righteousness
Sometimes the climb can be so steep
I may falter in my steps
But never beyond Your reach

And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
And step by step You’ll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days

Children of the 80s, remember that Mighty Kid Christmas commercial where the kid in the car gave his shoes to the street kid? The memory still makes me teary-eyed because it was a rather selfless act in a holiday where sometimes it’s about receiving presents. And he was a really cute chubby kid so happy with his shoes until he saw someone who needed them more.

Anyway, my friend is organizing a gift campaign to give shoes to the children in poor communities. all you have to do is pick a kid (or more) by tagging or leaving a comment under his/her pictures. and you can receive his/her shoe outline via email. buy her/him a pair of shoes. I can organize a one-time drop-off at my friend’s if ever you guys want to join. I participated last year and it was nice to go shoe shopping for children who I know don’t get new shoes all that often.

so, game? It’ll certainly make their Christmas.

To see the Facebook album click here.

Don’t you notice that whenever we have somebody come in front in church to do his/her testimony, that person’s already past that crisis/problem/former life and he/she always closes with an everything’sgreatnowpraisetheLord summary? And we all clap and we’re all blessed by the story. Have you ever had that feeling that you want to do that too? Give your story with a happy ending? But in the meantime, you’re right in the middle of something in your life that you still can’t make sense of, and things aren’t following the timeline?

This is what I feel about being a young adult, actually. Like I’m in the middle or at the brink of something that could be great (or horrible) and I have no idea of how I can make sense of what’s happening to me right now. All I know is that I just have to stay on my feet, keep going or be still (but I never really know if i’m supposed to keep on going or be still– I guess, being still is an emotional and spiritual state while moving forward is more of a mental and physical thing). There are days when I feel like I have everything in control and my head’s screwed on straight. And there are days when I’m just dragging my feet, pulled along because I have obligations and deadlines that I have to fulfill because I’m an adult and i have to be a good Christian, dengit! But in those days (like last week until last night), I just feel like giving up and just go on hibernation  until the world is all as it should be.

I love how David described these moments (it’s so accurate),

“I am poured out like water and all my bones are out of joint. My heart has turned to wax; it has melted away within me. My strength is dried up like [broken pottery] and my tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth; you lay me in the dust of death” (Psalm 22:14-18, NIV).

So what do we do when we’re in the middle? I don’t have exact answers to that, but from what I have experienced, we just have to submit to the process. We may not be able to control what’s happening to us, but we do have a choice on how to respond to it.

Being a Godspotter, I know that God’s right here in the middle with me– with all of us. But sometimes I just know it even if I can’t see or feel anything that tells me that’s true. I know you have those moments too and all we could do is have faith that He is still here with us. I find that in dealing with present pain, what helps the most is not talking about it to a friend (although that’s ok too), it’s in reaching out to another person who is in pain. Hard times build character, and it’s not just a cliche. Hard times show us how strong we really are. When we’re alone and we don’t even think our strength can handle it, God shows how strong He is in our weaknesses.

Of course, not everything in middle is so ma-drama or sad or hard. There is plenty to rejoice about, and things do get fun! But that belongs to another post.

But let me leave you with a continuation to David’s psalm after his lament on verses 14-20:

“I will declare your name to my people;
in the assembly I will praise you.” (Psalm 22:22 NIV)

Lord, thank You for all my days.
31 years is a long time to be faithful without fail.

Thank You for my Dad, my Mom, my Sisters and Brother.
Thank You for my Cat, the other cat and the dog
My friends at from childhood, at church, at work
Those random people I meet and love and don’t have a category
The men I loved… and don’t feel as strongly for anymore (hehe)
For the people I will eventually grow to love.
Thank You for my job
For all those articles I finished (and lost count)
For those articles I didn’t finish (can still count)
Those deadlines that I met headon and those that whooshed past
The blogs I wrote and didn’t
For the words I got credit for and didn’t

Thank you for taking me to places
All those car rides, plane rides, bus rides, train rides, boat rides
jeepney rides, tricycle rides, bike rides
All the food I ate strange, rich, bland, cheap and expensive
All the food I can still eat and all those I can’t anymore

Thank You for Jesus, and His name that brought me to life.
Thank you for making me weak so You can make me strong
For those reminders that I don’t know much, no not really, so I can learn more
For the plans I make only so You can change them
For breaking my heart so You can mend it
For taking me out of burning furnaces unbounded and without the smell of fire on me

Lord, thank You because I saw You there,
and there, and there, and there, and there
there, there, there, there… You were there
And now You’re here.
Thank God You’re here.

Thank You.

Happy Birthday to the best father in the world in the world Manny Juan! He has set such a high bar for all the men in our life, and we are so blessed to have him as our daddy.

My dad comes from a rare breed of men who fears and loves the Lord. He adores my mom, and he tirelessly protects, provides and cares for his family before himself. On top of that, he is really cool and has a quirky sense of humor! He also has great taste in clothes and shoes!

I love you, Daddy! Happy Birthday!

A PERSONAL PRAYER

O God, the Light of the heart that sees You,
The Life of the soul that loves You,
The Strength of the mind that seeks You:
May I ever continue to be steadfast in Your love.
Be the joy of my heart;
Take all of me to Yourself, and abide therein.
The house of my soul is, I confess, too narrow for You.
Enlarge it that You may enter.
It is ruinous, but do repair it.
It has within it what must offend Your eyes;
I confess and know it,
But whose help shall I seek in cleansing it but Yours alone?
To You, O God, I cry urgently.
Cleanse me from secret faults.
Keep me from false pride and sensuality
That they not get dominion over me.

(St. Augustine)

“Why am I doing this, really?” Andy Stanley has urged us to ask ourselves while facing the mirror, and to answer that question honestly.

I’ve been asking myself that a lot these days. Actually, for a whole year already, since I made the move to WinMakati. Especially now, with all the things I have volunteered to take on, I’m really wondering is it because I’m just stupid and activity-addicted this way, or is it something else?

What am I trying to prove? To myself, to others… to God?

“Every faculty you have, your power of thinking or of moving your limbs from moment to moment is given to you by God. If you devoted every moment of your whole life exclusively to His service, you could not give Him anything that was not in a sense His own already. So that when we talk of a man doing anything for God or giving anything to God, I will tell you what it is really life. It is like a small child going to His father and saying, “Daddy, give me a sixpence to buy you a birthday present.” Of course, the father does, and he is pleased with the child’s present. It is all very nice and proper, but only an idiot would think that the father is sixpence to the good of the transaction. When a man has made these two discoveries, God can really get to work. It is after this that real life begins. The man is awake now…” (C.S. Lewis)

*breathes*

a devotion

I have set the LORD always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. (Psalm 16:8)

There’s really no escaping You, is there? It wasn’t even a prayer, but I remember almost two decades before, telling my camp counselor that I want to know You “not just in an abstract ‘there is a God and He loves me way,’ but something more.” I guess what I meant was I wanted You to invade every aspect in my life so that my reality will be You over everything else. It wasn’t even a prayer, yet You took me up on that invitation. Now I have 30 and so years to look back to and see much how You’ve turned my world topsy turvy. Yes, even  at times I didn’t expect or even want You to. And I couldn’t take back what I said so many years before, when I was too young to know anything other than You. Your timing works so well that way.

Nothing is off-limits to You.

You’ve taken everything I held dear and showed me how much they are worth. My plans You have shaken into disarray and let me watch as Yours unfold far more beautifully than I could ever daydream or make them for myself. Through Your love, I love–even those I don’t want to love. It is by Your strength that I keep on moving forward. Jesus, it is by Your grace that I am forgiven and I forgive.

Thank You for never letting me forget it.

Eclipse everything in my sight, as I set You always before me.

Beautiful wisdom from a Nike ad many years ago:

You were born a daughter.
You looked up to your mother.
You looked up to your father.
You looked up at everyone.
You wanted to be a princess.
You thought you were a princess.
You wanted to own a horse.
You wanted to be a horse.
You wanted your brother to be a horse.
You wanted to wear pink.
You never wanted to wear pink.
You wanted to be a Veterinarian.
You wanted to be President.
You wanted to be the President’s Veterinarian.
You were picked last for the team.
You were the best one on the team.
You refused to be on the team.
You wanted to be good in algebra.
You hid during algebra.
You wanted the boys to notice you.
You were afraid the boys would notice you.

You started to get acne.
You started to get breasts.
You started to get acne that was bigger than your breasts.
You wouldn’t wear a bra.
You couldn’t wait to wear a bra.
You couldn’t fit into a bra.
You didn’t like the way you looked.
You didn’t like the way your parents looked.
You didn’t want to grow up.
You had your first best friend.
You had your first date.
You had your second best friend.
You had your second first date.
You spent hours on the telephone.
You got kissed.
You got to kiss back.
You went to the prom.
You didn’t go to the prom.
You went to the prom with the wrong person.
You spent hours on the telephone.
You fell in love.
You fell in love.
You fell in love.
You lost your best friend.
You lost your other best friend.
You really fell in love.
You became a steady girlfriend.
You became a significant other.

YOU BECAME SIGNIFICANT TO YOURSELF.

Sooner or later, you start taking yourself seriously. You know when you need a break. You know when you need a rest. You know what to get worked up about and what to get rid of. And you know when it’s time to take care of yourself, for yourself. To do something that makes you stronger, faster, more complete. Because you know it’s never too late to have a life. And never too late to change one.
JUST DO IT.