God Spotting

Dear Abba,

I’m remembering the crippled man that Jesus healed by the pool. He and I have a lot in common. I’ve always wondered about him. What happened to him afterward when he realized that leg muscles hurt, feet get dirty and cut, and he can’t make people carry him around anymore? Did he realize that miracles can only take him so far, and it’s the daily living of the healed that we would need You the most?

I’m certainly learning that. Now.

I’m not complaining— well, not now. You have put up with a lot my whining about this before, but, as always, You have been so patient. You know that I would get it sooner or later. I’m sorry for acting like I miss being crippled even after You have healed me. I find it really strange to miss that life, even if I know that I don’t want to go back to it anymore.

I am grateful that You have made me walk again.

So… where are we going?

Here’s to a life of forward motion
Of big dreams and wider horizons,
Brave decisions,
and absolutions

Here’s to a love big enough to cover the world,
Here’s to second chances, even a third
Here’s to prayers heard
and everything answered.

Here’s to new beginnings,
stories worth the telling,
and patient waiting
for truth unfolding

by Nichole Nordeman

There are times when faith and common sense do not align,
when hardcore evidence of you is hard to find,
and I am silenced in the face of argumenative debate,
it’s a long hill it’s a lonley climb. Maybe it’s true.

CHORUS:
Cause they want proof,
They want proof of all these mysteries I claim,
Cause only fools would want to chant a dead man’s name.
I would be a fool for you all because you asked me to.
A simpleton who’s seeming naive,
I do believe You came and made Yourself a fool for me.

I admit that in my darkest hours I’ve asked what if,
What if we created some kind of man made faith like this,
Out of good intention or emotional invention,
and after life is through there will be no You.

Cause they want proof of all these miracles I claim,
Cause only fools believe that men can walk on waves.
Maybe it’s true.

Unaware of popularity,
and unconcerned with dignity,
You made me free.
That’s proof enough for me.

I would be a fool for You,
Only if You asked me to,
A simpletonwho’s only think of,
The cause of love.

I will speak Jesus name,
and if that makes me crazy,
they can call me crazed,
I’m happy to be seemingly naive,
I do believe You came and
made Yourself a fool for me.

Hi! How are you? I’m just posting this blog before I run off and get ready to get to work. Yes, I’m still in the house, but i’ve been up and working since 5:30am (four articles finished in 24 hours!). Yes, that’s what I did for the extra day in our weekend.

I have to confess, with all the work and traveling and gimmicks this weekend, I had a hard time sticking to the 60-60 experiment, but God did give me something to reflect on yesterday as I was wrestling with procrastination (internet is a black hole!!!) and it’s:

I’M THE ONE YOU ARE LIVING FOR.

Yes, that was my facebook status yesterday too. And it hit me hard. I’m living for God, right? So what am I doing procrastinating? If i was living for Him, shouldn’t I be striving for excellence in everything I do? My work is part of my witness to this world– just as my church and ministry are. Work is part of my worship and by coddling with procrastination, I’m just treating it as something unimportant and can be put off at the last minute and submit something half-baked as a result.

What does my work say about my God?

Anyway, something that I thought we should think about. It is my prayer that we do everything excellently because WE ARE LIVING FOR GOD and He deserves nothing less than the best. It doesn’t sound easy in theory, and it’s a lot harder living it out. Because I fail so much more than I succeed. Praise God that He has grace enough to forgive and to strengthen us beyond our limits.

So anyway… with my backlog done. I’m going to do my best not to procrastinate anymore. God’s been bugging me with it all this time, as if to tell me– how can I expect Him to do wonders in my life if I keep on letting myself be distracted by trivial things?! So yeah… more stuff to give up, more stuff to handle. But it’s all for Him.

Live today for God’s glory!

Last night, I saw my high school teacher’s Facebook status that no amount of self-hypnosis can make her like Mondays. It got me thinking that I used to love Mondays (because of certain pastor’s day off), but lately, Mondays have gone back to its old ways and habits that make me dread them again.

This morning, I was determined to like this Monday. I have a shoot this afternoon, a free lunch with Food Magazine, and I have a staff meeting this morning, and a free evening later that could turn out to be anything. But the Monday seems to be as equally determined to fight my happy perkiness by having a brownout at 4am, thereby ruining my plans of writing my article before I get to work, the ridiculous traffic all the way to Quezon City (it took me 2 hours and a half!), and an overdue article looming over my head.

But you know what? I still woke up singing (in my head) even as I was sweating. My cat is still sleeping beside me on the bed despite the heat, and that’s always a good way to make me smile. And I am reminded this morning of God’s consolation that brings joy to my soul (Psalm 94:18-19).

I texted some of my friends about seizing this Monday with rejoicing, including my highschool teacher who hates Mondays. I told her I’m trying to rekindle my joy for each day, despite the overwhelming circumstances. And she replied, “When you do, teach me how.”

So i’ve made up a step by step program to liking Mondays. I’m just making it up as I go along, but at least I’m road testing them already. hahahaha!

Step 1: Wake up singing. While this doesn’t come naturally, maybe with practice?

Step 2: Start with a declaration of praise, read your Bible (I like starting with Psalms in the day)

Step 3: Take a shower and dress your best!

Step 4: have a good breakfast ala carte! (from my friend Liza)

Step 5: smile. smile. and keep on singing!

Step 6: Keep in touch with God the whole day

Step 7: Make the most of every opportunity to make this day better for other people

Step 8: Always find something to be grateful about

Ok…. that’s it so far. But try it! If you have anymore suggestions on how to turn a Monday to an awesome day, leave it on the comment box below.

I hope you guys have an awesome great Monday with our awesome great God. May you be overwhelmed by His grace and extravagant love!

by Jonathan Foreman and Tim Foreman (from Switchfoot’s, Hello Hurricane)

I’m on the run
I’m on the ropes this time
where is my song?
I’ve lost the song of my soul tonight

Sing it out
Sing it out loud
I can’t find the words to sing
You’d be my remedy
Sing it out
Sing it out
Take what is left of me
Make it a melody

My song
My song
I’ll sing with what’s left of me

Where is the sun
Feels like a ghost this time
Where have you gone
I need your breath in my lungs tonigh

Sing it out
Sing it out
I’m holding on
I’m holding on to you
My world is wrong
My world is a lie that’s come true
and I fall in love with the ones that run me through
When all along all I need is you

Sing it out

¹ Lord, you have been our dwelling place
throughout all generations.

² Before the mountains were born
or you brought forth the earth and the world,
from everlasting to everlasting you are God.

¹² Teach us to number our days aright,
that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

¹⁷ May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us;
establish the work of our hands for us—
yes, establish the work of our hands.

(Psalm 90: 1-2, 12, 17)

I’m skipping the backlogged days (I’ve written drafts of the posts, but I’ll p0st them later), I just want to start the day with this prayer, a reading from my devotions this morning.

You know how it is when God’s Word just hits the spot– like you’ve just bitten into a soft burger bun and on to the actual burger itself– crusty on the outside but oh-so juicy inside– and the flavors burst in your mouth like warm, spectacular, comforting fireworks. That’s what Moses’ psalm was to me this morning. Talk about breakfast of the champions!

No, I’m still not feeling a hundred percent yet. I’m going to start driving again, I have to even if I still feel a little shaky. I’m praying that the nerves will steady once I get on the groove. It’s a long day ahead, that’s why I’m so glad for my spiritual breakfast.

That song got it right: “Everyday with you, Lord, is sweeter than the day before.”

Godspeed everyone!

“When the earth goes topsy-turvy And nobody knows which end is up,
I nail it all down, I put everything in place again. .”
(Psalm 75:3, The Message)

I was dreaming that I wore a magical scarf that made everything be delayed for a couple of seconds after I’ve already done something– like whenever I would turn my head, it took my vision another second to be yanked into place. When I woke up and turned on my side, the feeling of having to yank the world along with me was still there. I sat up and the world started buckling under me and I recognized it– “uh, oh… I’m too young to get vertigo!”

It took me a while to stop yelling like I was in a roller coaster every time the world spins with every turn of my head. It must’ve been annoying to my sister who had to put up with me whoo-ing in her room while I held my hands over my eyes. My friend asked me if I think this has anything to do with the 60-60 experiment, and I said, why not? I don’t know what it’s all about yet, but God let it happen, so like in everything else, I’m going to trust Him with this.

I laughed when my Bible reading for that day took me to Psalm 75: 3: “When the earth and all its people quake, it is I who hold its pillars firm.” And I laughed even more when I saw The Message version of the same verse. God, I love it when Your word is so spot on at the very moment I need it.

On a different note:

I got to clean out my closet and found out how much clothes I actually have! I have three big garbage bags full of stuff to donate to the SAM garage sale, and funny enough, I still don’t have enough organized space in my closet for the clothes left over.

I have way too many tank tops and exercise clothes– and how many times do I go to the gym in a week? I have so many dressy tops, but I’ve been wearing dresses lately. Most of my jeans don’t fit anymore (they’re too big on me. naks!). I still don’t have space for my shoes. I’m running out of hanging space for my dresses and jackets. I think I still need to let go of more things– and that goes for the other things in my life. I’ve always seen my room as a metaphor of my life. I guess that much hasn’t changed.

My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
(Psalm73:26)

This day was hard, emotion-wise. Everything may have gone smoothly and on schedule, but my heart was stuck on the breakup once again. It felt fresh again, and for once, I was glad for the traffic jam that let me have a lot of time to cry and pour out my heart to God.

I complained and whined. I asked God why do I have to be the strong girl– a complaint that I’ve had most of my life. Why can’t I just be the regular girl who can cry and be weak and heartbroken? Then I was interrupted with the thought, “Who say’s you’re the one who’s strong anyway?” And who says I don’t cry and I’m not weak? Ok, so I may not be heartbroken, but why do I keep on acting like I am? And that shut me up for a beat. I stopped complaining for a while and took out my Bible (yes, the traffic jam was that bad). Turns out, Psalm 73:26 was part of my Bible reading that day. Touche, God. Well, of course I knew all along that it’s not really my strength, but God, I’m so tired.

I wonder if Moses ever thought of making his friends put his arms down because they were already asleep during the battle of Rephidim.

Thinking about it now, that day was a like a battle for me. And God sent unlikely (well, not really that unlikely) friends to hold me up. M, my unofficial cheerleader, just kept on assuring me that I was awesome– and if he weren’t gay, he would totally hit on me (haha!). And J, my chocolate bear– who knew what it’s like to feel one thing despite knowing what is right, and has lived with that struggle all his life with no end in sight– just kept on telling me to hang on and move forward in faith and hope. For what else can we do, when things are beyond our control?

At the end of the day, I found myself talking to another friend in her room while she struggled to hold herself together under the pressure of everything that she had to finish at work and at church. We shared our struggles and gave each other encouragement. And I prayed for her– something we both needed. She needed it because she was so stressed and lonely, and I needed to get out of my head and share the strength that I had been given to help out a sister.

Thank God for friends, Christian or not, God uses them just the same to comfort and to teach lessons that should have been learned several times before.

For some reason, I really thought that life would get easier during the 60-60 Experiment but then again, if my desire is to grow even closer to God and go farther with Him in our journey, that’s not exactly going to happen all the time, right? If I want to see His strength, He would have to expose my weaknesses. If I want to be healed, I have to show Him all my wounds. If I want to minister, I would do it with all transparency, because I’m a person saved and sustained by grace too. Kinda scary, right? But onward we go!