I overheard my coworkers talking about fault lines and earthquakes yesterday. In the wake of Nepal’s earthquakes recently, there has been a resurgence of earthquake preparedness awareness on social media, and it has become a hot topic once again. There’s even a website to help you calculate how far you are from the West Valley Fault, along with the affected populations of the surrounding barangays! We really should be aware about these things. Since our country is on the Pacific Ring of Fire, a huge fault line runs through the…read more
Yes, I am 34 now. No amount of compliments that I don’t look like my age can change that. And I have to say that 34 feels a lot different from 33, or 30. Unlike the years before, that just blend into the next, 34 feels like a huge cog in the wheel resounding with a solitary click. My birthdays used to be a big deal to me and I loved to throw parties to celebrate, but lately, I have been wanting more and more to be left alone as I see…read more
I have to admit that the thought that maybe I am meant to be single and unmarried for all my life does cross my mind once in a while. Once when the haze of meeting someone new clears and the reality that he is an actual person–both wonderful and flawed at the same time, working on an entirely different script that I didn’t write for him–has finally sunk in, I find myself fearfully stepping back. Heart carefully tucked just out of reach. This does worry me a bit. But we’re…read more
“You were wrong. It did work out.” “I am so proud of you.” “Let’s be friends.” “I understand.” “Are you ok?” “You will be fine.” “I’m not going anywhere.” “I’m so glad you’re here.” “Anything I can do to help?” “Where are you?” “I get it.” “I’m sorry for breaking all those promises I made.” “I know you have been working really hard on this.” “Need a hug?” “Thank you.” “Well done.” For Truth Thursdays.
How are you? You know already. But… Can I just lie and say, “I’m ok?” No. Ok… so, I’m not really THAT ok. I mean, I’m working hard to look ok, because, I don’t know– I just don’t want people to think that I’m not…ok…um Because that takes a longer answer. Yes. And I’m tired. Why are you tired? Because I have to look ok, when I’m not. You already said that. I know… So? How are you, really? I’m… hiding. I don’t know why, but for some reason, my defenses…read more
When it was over I was still standing I was whole Nothing broken When it was over I was mended I was stronger Though I was sad that it ended When it was over We walked forward After I’d been through I was no longer a coward When it was over You knew what to do When it was over We started something new. (For Truth Thursdays)
“Scars are not injuries… A scar is a healing. After injury, a scar is what makes you whole.” (China Miéville) I have scars on my hand, one covers all the fingers on my right hand from a fire I started on purpose but did not mean to burn. I have stitches on my wrist that I don’t remember getting from my childhood. And I have scar tissue in my wrist, probably, where it broke in second grade. The cuts don’t show as much, I’m glad. Then there are the scars…read more
In time I will be. Perfect. Complete. It is my Creator’s promise, after all. He who began a good work in me will be faithful to complete it in the end. For now though, I feel it. I feel unfinished. Like I’m always in the brink of something big and I’m not there yet. But it’s exhilarating to keep on moving forward, constantly asking “What’s next? What’s next?” This promise of wholeness and completion gives me the joy and hope and strength to keep on moving. When I fall, I know I can…read more
(This is actually for my Truth Thursdays last week…) Today. I left behind everything that I owe. Replies to text messages. Audio recordings I have to upload at our church websites. My credit card bills. That meeting I have to set. The plans I have to implement for the writing group for the media ministry for my work. The dinner I had to cook. Because it’s Saturday. And I’m tired. And sometimes to just feel better I leave these behind And just get back to them later.
“Tell me stories, Steffi!!!” my friend yelled above the music. She, being a single mom doing freelance work mostly from home so she can take care of her two year-old son, insists on living vicariously through me, her “single and available” friend who’s always out and about. I just stared at her, wracking my brain for A Story, something that would merit her trip through the traffic just to meet me tonight for dinner and drinks to Catch Up. “I’m out of stories!” I said, just a hint of despair…read more