Archive for February, 2012
I first started blogging in 2003, mainly so I could get used to writing for an audience.
I’ve been keeping a journal since sixth grade, so writing about myself and my thoughts have never been an issue. Writing for myself was easy. I didn’t have to make an effort to be understood, or to be grammatically correct. In the privacy of my journal, I wrote down my observations and opinions of other people without any fear of hurting their feelings or being wrong. But blogging… I didn’t know who was reading. It scared me a little, yet I wanted to be read. It thrilled me whenever people would comment on my blog (this was before twitter and facebook, mind you, and I don’t think you could plug your blog in Friendster), but word got around and soon I had a community of readers whose blogs I read too.
(I even sort of met my 2nd boyfriend through my blog—he commented on nearly every post, even if I hadn’t met him yet. When we met, it was like we had known each other for a long time already because of our blogs.)
Blogging changed the way I wrote—especially now. It streamlined my thoughts and the topics I wrote about. While I am far from pandering to my audiences (I never knew exactly what they wanted me to write about anyway), I sometimes write about things that they expected, what they said they liked reading. I stopped mentioning real names, unless with permission, and in a way, have taken a blogging persona that, while is not too far from the everyday me, is someone who is much more glib, wiser (I do try), more interesting, and godlier (because it is called Godspotted, after all). I don’t know if this how it should be, but it’s becoming this way.
And don’t get me started on Twitter and Facebook.
As Christians, whether we mean to or not, correct me if I’m wrong here, we do play to an audience too, right? Or even if we don’t, we are very conscious of the people who know that we are Christians, and in a way, this makes us be better people than we would have been. We dress more modestly, we don’t say bad words (unless by accident), we don’t drink (or drink too much), and we try to be nicer than most people.
In Hebrews 12:1 it says, “We are surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses…” And we are. People are watching. Most of the time, people only care when we screw up. But much like Jeremy Lin, Tim Tebow (look him up, he’s a Christian football player), and Manny Pacquiao (who had just recently announced that he’s been born-again), we bear the name of Christ into a world that holds us under a higher standard just because we say we are Christians. They might not subscribe to what Jesus is all about, but they do measure us up against his teachings, and have some sort of investment in us when we succeed or fail at it.
Weird huh?
We certainly know we are Christians. And we know—much more of what goes on behind the scenes than the rest of the world does—how much we struggle, fail and screw up in being one. Hence, we are a lot harder on ourselves sometimes.
Being a Christian is a tricky balance that we need to pull off every day. We are encouraged at church to live for the Audience of One, but we certainly shouldn’t ignore the “multitude of witnesses” that surrounds us wherever we go. How then, can we sanely go about it?
Jesus, with his beatitudes (All of Matthew 5-7), has outlined for us how to be his followers in this world. It’s hard, and sometimes it’s like it’s against commonsense, but Jesus says that we are wise if we do what he says.
In his letter to Titus, Paul said that the same saving grace that was given to us also enables us to do obey God and do what is right (Titus 2:11-12). Every principle that we need to navigate through this world is found in the Bible. We are equipped to live a life that is both pleasing to God and man.
Of course, this doesn’t make it any easier. Jesus never said that it would be. But He also said that He has overcome the world, and He is with us, until the end of the age.
Hebrews 12: 1 continues, “…let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.”
So let’s keep on blogging, working, running, walking, and living!
Confession, I have joined the ranks of Jeremy Lin fans. But no, I haven’t seen any of his games, just a few videos. I’ve just read and read a lot about him. It’s really an amazing story, huh? In a league of super stars and multimillion dollar paychecks, there’s this player in there who gets minimum wage and was deemed so insignificant that he just kept on being passed on from one team to another. The reasons for which his coach even sent him out to the court are not even all that flattering– they were just THAT desperate. With all that baggage, it would be understandable if Lin had just begrudgingly done his day’s work, show up and just keep the ball going. But Lin didn’t. He threw off all the baggage from all those years of rejection and played. His. Heart. Out. And it was marvelous. It was so inspiring that it revived a basketball franchise that everybody else was nearly giving up on. Fans showed up and cheered for their team again. Even fans of other teams cheered for the Knicks because of Lin! People who don’t normally watch basketball (me) are cheering for Lin.
Why?!
I mean, basketball fans, I can understand, but after only two weeks and seven consecutive wins, he’s got the world (at least the parts of it with internet and isn’t at war or famine) watching and cheering him on. What is it about this kid that makes us connect to him?
My guess is hope.
And hope come from character, which comes from perseverance, which comes from suffering (Romans 5:3-6), and everyone in this world, in our own way, knows about suffering. From the baby who just got out of the warmth of his mother’s womb and just rudely pushed out into the cold and bright world (no wonder babies cry when they get out), to old people who are slowly breathing their last, suffering and struggle are there all the way. And this is true for EVERYONE, Christian or not, living in developed countries or not. Some suffer more than others, of course, but what keeps us going and pushing, straining against the tension, even fighting against quitting? It is hope. Hope that this too shall pass. Hope that we can get over it. Hope that tomorrow will be better. Hope that there is reward when all the struggling is over. Even the most despondent of people can open their eyes and keep on breathing. Most of us still get off the bed even if we don’t feel like it. Bridges are finished. Work gets done. Fat is exercised away and muscles are built. Games are won. Our mothers still love us.
Just as we cheer whenever someone like Lin pushes and shines through his suffering through perseverance, we feel that it is a tragedy whenever someone gives up. Suicides, euthanasia, quitting, breakups, divorces are all tragic because it means that someone has let go of hope. Of course, hope, perseverance, character and suffering are all measured differently in each person so we can’t– and shouldn’t compare. We can only encourage each other to go on, to keep moving forward, and to never give up hope. Whatever hope that they may hold on to. Our hope is the kind that never fails or puts us to shame (it’s Jeremy Lin’s brand of hope too!) because of God’s love that has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit given to us through Jesus Christ. This is the hope that the world needs, our perseverance through sufferings, and the joy that we have despite all evidence contrary speaks volumes in a world desperate for this fuel that they need to never give up.
A little background and introduction: The Daily Pandesal is a daily email devotional by the Single Adults Ministry (SAM) of Word International Makati. The Daily Pandesal is also a website that my friends and I have been putting together since time immemorial, but because we haven’t really gotten off the ground just yet, I lent the name to the SAM first. This is the Tuesday Pandesal Liza sent us this morning all the way from Amsterdam where she is currently working on her PhD.
bitter sa Valentine’s day:) Even before Valentine’s Day I have been grappling with the problem of being in a relationship or more specifically not being in a relationship. Whatever our status whether we have a significant other or not (yet), I believe we need God’s perspective on relationships. The Lord led me to this article titled ‘Pursuing Love’ by John Fischer. http://singleness.org/pursuing.shtml
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Loving God:
This is different from believing in God. Of course, one must believe that God exists before he has a relationship with Him, but there’s the difference. One can believe that there is a God, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that he loves God. Loving God means that for him, God is someone who is so personal and close enough to love. Loving God means that he believes the best of Him, no matter what the circumstances may initially lead one to think. Loving God means that he is in constant pursuit of Him to know Him more. He trusts God to know what’s best and obeys Him even when he doesn’t understand. He honors God in his dealings and relationships.
I don’t know if that made any sense. It all sounded better in that imaginary conversation with that imaginary friend who may or may not like me in my head.
This leads me to my own reflection on my own relationship with my God– the God who I know loves me despite–or maybe because– of who I am. I don’t understand this love, and sometimes I don’t trust it enough to catch me when He tells me to jump. But there are times when I let myself bask in it and rest in its security. If I were to define my relationship with God, my first label would be “it’s complicated” because if anybody would ask me about it, I wouldn’t know where to begin. But I think for Him it’s simple enough: I’m His child, He knows everything there is to know about me and then some, and He has made up His mind to love me, no matter what I do. Of course, that does’t necessarily mean that everything I do pleases Him, I’m sure they don’t. I think I even sadden Him whenever I sin on purpose. And while this knowledge sometimes doesn’t keep me from sinning (to my chagrin, especially now that I’ve actually admitted and written it down), this makes me realize just how close and personal God can really get.
I know that I am talking about the all-powerful God who still gets His way and does things His way, whose plans are never thwarted. He is that big and powerful to be everything that He really is– up close and in a Creator of the Universe kind of way.
This love humbles too, because it puts me in my place.
Right now, He is my God-who-is-with-me-in-limbo.
Valentine’s Day is upon us once again. That one day in the year (excluding weddings of friends and younger relatives) that singles are reminded that they are very much single, and couples are reminded to go out on a romantic date or get flowers and whatnot. While I am not the mushy type, I think I will indulge that teeny tiny part of me for this Daily Pandesal post (sort of).
Dear You, 
I’m not going to ask you where you are now. I’m not going to be impatient. This season, I will inhabit one day at a time. I will sail into the future on mystery’s wings and I will not look back. I have been too much like the man who asks, “Are you looking for me?” Our hearts yearn backward. We long to be found, hoping our searchers have not given up and gone home. But I no longer hope to be found. Do not follow me! Let’s just be fabulously where we are and who we are. You be you and I’ll be me, today and today and today, and let’s trust the future to tomorrow. Let the stars keep track of us. Let us ride our own orbits and trust that they will meet. May our reunion be not a finding but a sweet collision of destinies!
Until that time you can call me yours, I remain,
Stef
Yes, it’s an old blogpost I wrote for Valentine’s day in 2008. I lifted and adapted it from “Love, Stargirl” by Jerry Spinelli. Funny how even until now, I still feel the same– that hope, this determination to inhabit this season one day at a time and to be fabulously where I am and who I am, trusting the future to tomorrow.
I know that for some of us (as my well-meaning relatives never fail to remind me) that our body clocks are winding down fast, and I don’t know about you, sometimes I do feel that panic that I’m being left behind by something. And yet… and yet I am reminded to wait on the Lord.
Wait. ON. the Lord.
When I was a teenager and had been to a few love, courtship, marriage lectures already, I thought that to “Wait on the Lord” implies a lot of waiting, just sitting still until something happened. But it turns out that it could mean something else. Have you ever thought about what that “waiting on” really means? Well, that phrasal verb has a lot of meanings, but according to English.com “wait on” means “to provide someone with everything they need or want” kinda like a waiter, or a butler, something of the sort.
Waiting on Lord can also actually mean being like a waiter– standing at attention, actively serving the Lord! Great waiters anticipate what the costumer needs and immediately get it for them. Waiting on the Lord doesn’t have to be a time of idleness and impatience for the perfect time, but a time to serve Him wholeheartedly–especially in places and circumstances where we’re not expected to serve Him.
I’ve read so many articles about the virtues of waiting (and there are times when we really do have to sit still– Psalm 27:14 tells us to “Wait for the Lord”), but let me just invite you to reflect on that phrasal verb in a different way, especially this season when it feels like we’ve just been waiting and waiting and waiting for that “ONE.” He/she could come soon, or later, or 20 years from now… or never. But don’t despair. Let tomorrow worry about itself, as Jesus said, seek first the kingdom of heaven, and all these things shall be added unto you.
“But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” Isaiah 24:31
Love,
Stef
p.s. Please join the National YA’s Post-Valentines event: A Prom to Remember. Let’s have fun and be cheesy with fellow young adults from other WIN churches.
Date: Feb 17, 2012 (Friday)
Time: 7pm to 11pm
Venue: The Collumns, cor. Ayala and Buendia ave., Makati
Attire: semiformal (dress for the ladies, long sleeves and slacks at least for the men)
Reg fee: P350-P500
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